Perseverance

I've never won an award or been the best at something. I've always remained among the crowd of unacheivers and always been reminded through trial and error that I am a failure. When you are a failure you stop making multiple goals and you just make one: do something for yourself. Stop trying to impress other people who don't truly matter to you. Do something without a goal or achievement or any kind of recognition and just do something that makes you feel good. The only approval you need is your own and without that, you've lost you're existence.

I know a lot of kids stressed out about school because there parents force them so harshly to do well that it has had a negative effect on their sanity. They over estimate their power and wear themselves out. Or they over multitask and then forget about a test they had and just like that they resent themselves and are angry. I'd prefer to be happy than smart. I may be dumb but at least I'm content.

I still don't know what I want to do for myself. I have no idea what my future is because I am not there yet. I don't have a goal except that one day I will do the most meaningful thing but it wont mean a thing to anyone but me. Because when you fail so much failing doesn't hurt as much, succeeding just feels better.